THE CONFUSED
BUTTERFLY
By Judy L. Poe
I thought I was an ugly
worm,
For I was taught this was
the case;
And I always felt defeated,
But just assumed this was my
place.
I used to watch the
butterfly,
As she soared among the
trees;
Her brilliant colors flashing
bright,
As she floated about with
ease.
But a worm, alas, was I it
seemed,
That crawled upon the
ground;
And there appeared no hope
for me,
Till new life in Heaven I
found.
But in the meantime, here on
earth,
I was told to do the best I
could;
And not to do the things I
shouldn't,
And try to do the things I
should.
So for many years I worked
real hard,
To be the best worm I could
be;
I worked and planned and
served and studied,
To "help" God work
His plan for me.
But my load became too
heavy,
And failure darkened every
door;
I said, "God, I just
can't do it",
He said, "That's what
I've waited for."
An then, through the Holy
Spirit,
And His precious truths
confirmed;
He said, "My child, you
are a butterfly,
Stop acting like a worm.
When you trusted Christ as
Savior,
You were changed and made
brand new;
And those years you've acted
like a worm,
Christ has longed to live
through you."
So my "place" I
found at last was grace,
And I thanked God for what
I'd learned;
For when I surrendered all
to Him,
I knew, at last, the worm
had turned.
SURRENDERING
RIGHTS
A lot of
misunderstanding surrounds the concept of Total Commitment. If one desires the
best that God offers then Total Commitment is required. The more one gives and
surrenders in Total Commitment the more one will understand and know of God.
Understanding Christ's Life in you (The Exchanged Life) is understanding
and experiencing what Christ can do in you and through you. It is what He can
do in you and through you that He desires, not what you can do, accomplish or
achieve.
Another name
for Total Commitment is Total Surrender or a personal Gethsemane expressed this
way, "I want what You want more than anything else in life. Work on my
case, and I will accept whatever You do." Many times we can give Him
permission to do anything He wants to do in us, to us, with us and through us,
but then complain because He doesn't do what we want Him to do and then we
become angry.
Total
Commitment involves the surrender and release of that which I believe to be
rightfully mine. But I really do not have that right. These are not rights.
These are things I have been made to believe are mine, and that God owes me
this. God does not owe me anything. He gave me His own Son. There is a large difference
between what God chooses to give and what He owes.
We tend to cling to or hang on to each of the
following as rights in an effort to meet our own felt needs:
MIND, EMOTION, WILL: I want to function from my soul.
My mind and emotions are programmed with a world system philosophy and this get
in the way of my relationship with God. The enemy wants me to function from my
feelings and thoughts with no guidelines or limitations.
HEALTHY BODY:
People will like me better if I have an attractive body. I could have
done a better job on me than God did. But God does not demonstrate His power in
creating attractive bodies. He is more interested in re-creating Himself within
us. Jesus "had no form or comeliness in His looks." There was nothing
outstanding in His looks.
FUTURE PLANS:
My Heavenly Father does not owe me anything. He is working to form
desires within my heart. Scripture says my first desire should be to know Him
in His fullness.
GEOGRAPHICAL LOCATION:
My attitude should be a willingness to live where He directs. I desire
the best, and the best is to be where He wants me to be at any time (state,
city, street, block, house on the block).
MARRIAGE: The tendency is to demand of God a spouse.
If I believe God owes me a mate and I do not have one, I can become bitter and
angry toward God. I will want to know when He is going to finish the job of
completing me with a mate. My identity is not wrapped up in whether I am
married or not. My identity in God is who I am individually. But I tend to see
my identity in another form because this is the way society sees it.
RECREATION: I have no right to choose an activity that
would not be honoring to God. My tendency is to function as if this is MY LIFE!
But Scripture says that I have been bought with a price. I am not my own.
SUCCESS: I feel
that I belong on top, because I am His child and God desires that I prosper.
But the Lord Jesus stressed the spiritual, not the physical. I want to take all
those things and put them in a physical realm saying that this is what God
wants for me. But I cannot measure in a physical way that which God desires for
my life. By all earthly standards Christ's ministry was a flop! But it
accomplished all that God intended. The prospering that God wants for me is
that I mature and grow spiritually not that I measure up to some earthly
standard that says that I acquired all this because I am His.
CLING TO THE PAST: I like to remember what he, she or
they did to me. It gives me reason to complain. But this becomes a cop-out for
my present attitude. I want to be angry and I want others to know all about
what happened to me.
HABITS: I buy into a belief system which says that I
am only human and that no one is perfect and that a man has to have one vice.
But the Scripture says that I am indwelt by the Spirit of the Living God,
therefore I am not just human. The Spirit of God lives in Me. That makes me
more than just human.
POSSESSIONS: Everything I perceive to be a possession
will ultimately begin to possess me. It is easy to say, "Heavenly Father,
I give you my car," but what if He tells me to give it away tomorrow? I am
a steward. God has given me possessions as a trust. I am to take care of God's
trust they are not really mine. But I will cling to anything I think I own, and
if someone violates MY STUFF, I will react in anger. "How dare they do
this to my house, to me, to my car, etc.!!!?"
TIME: I do need to get away from things occasionally,
however my attitude should never be one of demanding MY time. The Lord Jesus
took ten specific breaks from His ministry in three years.
REPUTATION: I want people to think well of me. But
what did people think and say about the Lord Jesus? What kind of reputation did
He have?
DEFY AUTHORITY: This covers every area of life -
parent/child, law, boss, head, God.
ACCEPTANCE: inside of me I tend to say, “Don't I have
a right to get my acceptance needs met in others?” I have spent much of my life
trying to milk acceptance from others. "Oh! PLEASE accept me!" But I
am not to look to the world or to others for my acceptance. There is a big
difference between WANTING other's acceptance and NEEDING it. I am accepted by
God totally and completely in the Lord Jesus. If I spend my time trying to get
my acceptance needs met in others, I will not look to God as my need-meeter.
WILL OF GOD: At times I tend to believe that God has
shown me His will, and I come to believe I know exactly what God wants, but it
all falls apart. I have presumed to know precisely what God wants. Often the
enemy will give a stone and will try to convince me that it is bread and I
conclude, "Look what God has given me!" But God did not give it. It
came from the enemy. It is not the real thing. When I find out it is a stone
and not bread, I become angry with God, but God did not do it.
HAPPY HOME: I NEED a neat, clean orderly home to be
happy. Therefore, kids make your beds, clean your rooms, put your toys away.
PROBLEMS, DIFFICULTIES: I tend to think bad things
happen to others. I believe good things mean God is blessing me, and bad things
mean He is angry with me. As long as I am in this world I am potentially
subject to every tragedy and difficulty that could happen. The difference is
how I respond. Sometimes that is the only witness I will have to the world.
TAKING OFFENSE: I cannot offend a humble person. If I
am humble I cannot be offended. A humble person can never be told anything
about himself that he does not already know. When offenses come I need to keep
short accounts by forgiving.
REAPING WHAT I SOW: I will reap what I sow. I want to
do what I want to do, but I do not want to reap what I have sown. I may even
confess my actions as sin. Many times God has kept me from reaping what I have
sown, but He does not have to do so.
BE RIGHT: I must have the last word to verify my
position. I need to admit that I do and can make wrong decisions, instead of
functioning as if everything I do is right.
BE LOVED: Do I want love? Yes! Do I have a right to be
loved? No! However, God does love me.
VISIBLE SECURITY: Land, possessions, money, stocks,
bonds. It may be necessary for God to withhold any visible security so I will
have to trust Him totally. It is too easy to trust what He has given instead of
Him.
USED OF GOD: I want to be used of God, but I do not
see Him using me. Why He does not use me is not the real issue, which is why
should He use me? Who am I that He should use me? God does not have to use
anybody. If I did not praise Him, the rocks would! I may not be ready for His
use.
SEE RESULTS: God may lead me to do something and I
want to see the results of my labors. The Word says that some plant the seed,
some water, but the harvest is the Lord's. But I want to be in on the harvest.
DEMAND FROM GOD: The only right I have is the right to
the Lord Jesus and all that He is. This has been given to me. It is not a right
I earned. It is not a right I deserve. It is a right that was given to me
through the act of salvation, through receiving the Lord Jesus as my Lord. And
in that salvation I got Him and all that He is. Therefore, I function in the strength
of Christ - - all that He is in me.
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